Rise
by Merlinfan26
Summary: Castle gets shot instead of Beckett at the funeral.
1. Chapter 1

**Just an idea I couldn't stop thinking about after watching the season 3 finale again.**

**Prologue**

Castle eyed the graveyard where he saw a flash of the rifle.

"Kate, look out!" He bellowed. Beckett's eyes widened as she felt Castle's body shove her to the ground. She laid there, and gasped for breath. There were screams everywhere.

"Castle?" She whispered. "Castle!" She panicked when she didn't hear him respond. Kate then pushed herself up and rolled Richard Castle's body over.

There was blood coming out from his chest.

"No," she gasped, tears in her eyes. Her throat held back a scream wanted to escape. "No, Castle!" Her voice was desperate,pleading, and begging.

She had just lost Captain Montgomery, she couldn't lose Richard Castle, too.

They were all dead. He couldn't be next on the list. If that happened his death would be on her hands.

"Daddy!" She heard Alexis scream from the distance.

"_Richard_!" She heard Martha's shriek. It was the shriek of a mother in despair. Kate closed her eyes.

"Espo, Ryan, hold them back!' She shouted.

Her two friends obeyed. Kevin grabbed Alexis as she thrashed in his arms, tears cascading down her cheeks.

"_Daddy_!"

Esposito clung onto Martha as she sobbed into his shoulders, not enabling herself to look at her son.

Kate fixated on Castle's wound, and on his face.

"Rick?" She saw that his eyes had fluttered open. "Rick, stay with me!" She pressed her hands against his wound. "Rick!" His body shuddered, as his head went limp in her arms, and his eyes shut.

"_No_!" She stared in utter grief and horror as she watched the life start to drain from one of the people she cared most about.

* * *

The next few minutes was a blur. She raced with them into the ambulance. Laine was on top of Rick's body, pressing against the wound.

Kevin and Esposito was taking Alexis and Martha to the hospital.

She stayed in the ambulance, also, and gripped Castle's cold hands as she watched him flat line.

Beckett had to remember to breathe herself as she watched, wide and anxious eyes.

Breathe in and out, in and out.

It had to become a rhythm for her to be able to do it.

In, and out. In, and out.

"Please,Castle," she whispered. Tears rolled down her cheeks. "I need you."

Laine glanced slightly at her as they tried to revive Castle, but quickly focused on him again.

Suddenly there was breathing, this time coming from Castle.

Everyone in the ambulance sighed a relief. But it was far from over.

They quickly wheeled him into the hospital, Laine still on his chest, shouting at him to stay with them again. Kate ran beside her.

"Laine, he's losing so much blood-"

"I know, girl, I'm trying my best to save him!" Laine replied, fast and briskly.

"You need to get down!" Shouted one of the doctors.

"He's my friend!" Laine shouted back, tears on her own face.

"Then let us do our job and save him!"

Kate helped Laine down and stared at her best friend who was covered in Castle's blood.

Laine was shaking, almost more than she was.

"Oh God, Kate, it could have been you," she whispered.

Kate swallowed painfully. She was all too aware of how close it was. Of how Rick had saved her life. He really was her partner.

Within minutes Esposito, Kevin, Alexis, and Martha came running up to them.

"What's going on?" Alexis demanded. "Where's my father?"

"He's in surgery, sweetie," Laine told her. Alexis gasped, her face turning an ashen color as Martha grabbed her into a fierce hug. Both sobbed onto each other. Kate ran her fingers through Alexis's hair, not knowing what else to do-but wanting to comfort Castle's daughter.

"He'll be all right," she said, determination in her voice. "He's a fighter."

"He is," agreed Martha, brushing off her own eyes. "My boy is a fighter. Kate's right, Alexis. Your father will prevail, he always does."

But Alexis could not be comforted. Her worst fear had happened. Her father had been shot while playing cop.

So Kate decided to try and hug her. Alexis clung onto her and Kate rocked her in a maternal kind of way.

"He loves you, you know," his daughter whispered against her uniform. She paused, and her face paled.

"What?"

"He loves you, more than he's loved anyone."

She sighed and bit her lip, while she continued to rock Alexis back and forth-like she would for a small child.

"I know," she finally admitted. Finally the truth had clawed it's away to the top. All it took was a bullet for it to escape. "I know.

And so she continued to rock Alexis while they waited to see if Richard Castle would prevail, or if this was one battle he could not win.

**I hope it's not horrible! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow! Thanks for all the reviews!And the advice! I didn't think i'd get any! I am not going to have Josh operate on Castle. It worked on the show because of Kate/Josh, but I don't want to walk into a trap where kate might feel like she "owes" Josh something. And i liked Josh, so I don't want to make him "evil" either.**

Kate paced nervously in the waiting room. She could not sit still. She glanced at the seats where Alexis was laying on resting her head on Martha's lap. Martha gently stroked her hair as her eyes gazed about the empty room. Kate sighed and sat next to Castle's mother. Enourmas guilt filled her until it got higher and higher, almost suffocating her.

It was her fault that Martha Rodger's son was fighting for his life. If only she had listened to Rick and had backed away. IF only...so many of those floated around her head until she had to push them away.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered as she grabbed Martha's other hand. "It's all my fault."

Martha glanced at her in surprise.

"Why on earth would you say something like that?" She demanded.

Kate blinked.

"Because the sniper was aiming for me. Because I wouldn't back down from my mother's case, even though everyone who's worked on it has ended up dead. Because I wouldn't listen to Rick." Her throat closed at the mention of his name.

"Now you listen to me," Martha Rodgers said in a fierce voice. "None of this is your fault, Kate." It felt strange for Martha to call her by her first name, but a good kind of strange.

"My boy has been capable of making his decisions for some time now. He decided to become a consultant. He knew the risks, and the dangers. But he decided to do it anway

"He decided to because he wanted to help people. And he wanted to help you." Martha's voice tried to be stready, but there were cracks in it. "I want you to know something

else. I haven't seen Richard this happy since he became a consultant, started to work with you, since...ever. Not even when he was married both times. He cares for you deeply Kate. I hope you know that."

Beckett sat there. That was the second time a member of Castle's family had decided to tell her Castle's true feelings for her. Deep down she had always been aware of them but hearing them outloud...She bit her lip, not ready to admit her feelngs in return. Martha seemed to sense this.

"I understand if you can't confess anything yet. I'm only telling you this to make you feel less guilty. He LOVED helping you. He just loved being with you. This is no one's fault but the man who shot my son. Do you understand me?"

Kate stared into Martha Rodger's eyes. For a moment she was staring at her mother, and it was Johanna Beckett who was telling her all of this. She blinked back tears, and looked away.

"Yes," she whispered. "But i'm not sure if I can allow myself to accept that."

Martha nodded.

"Discarding blame is not an easy process. i'm all too aware of that."

Kate didn't know what else to say, so she just sat there.

The night crawled on as she rested her head against the cold wall of the hospital.

Flashes of going to the morgue to see her mother's body drifted through her mind.

She could not, would not, see Castle's body at the morgue.

That was not allowed.

Kate swallowed as she thought about the past three years. She at first hated the idea of Castle tagging along, like an annoying puppy. And she remembered how surprised she was when she started to develop a fondness for him, and how they finally became real friends. More than friends, partners. But even Castle had admited he didn't know what they were. She didn't either. She did know that she had never felt these intense feelings before. Not even with Josh, who she cared for deeply.

But with Castle it was a new kind of feeling, and it scared her to death. It terrified her because it made her vulnerable to loss.

The reason why they were all on that waiting room was the main reason she was so terrified. She couldn't bare to lay her heart out, to get it smashed.

The thought of losing someone she loved...

Kate paused in mid thought.

Did she love Castle? She was't sure if she could admit that to herself, even.

Finally a doctor walked up to them. Martha shook Alexis awake, and all stood up.

"Family for Richard Castle? "

Martha nodded.

"That's us."

The doctor looked momentarly surprised to see all the people in the room, but continued to talk.

"Are you his mother?"

Martha quickly nodded again. Kate grabbed her hand for support as she watched the doctor's face. She could tell that it would not be good news.

"Well, the good news is that your son will live."

Breaths of relief filled the room. Martha cupped her hand over her mouth and started to sob. Alexis did the same, both out of relief. Kate prompted the doctor.

"But?"

"But...the recovery process will be long, and intense. There might be some brain damage when he wakes up."

"Wait..." Kate paused. "Brain damage? What kind?" How come she didn't consider that a possiblity? Her primal fear, and concern, had been Castle's survival-not the aftermath.

"We don't know," the doctor admitted. "it could be minimum, and it could be severe."

"How severe are we talking about?" Martha demanded in a no nonsense kind of tone.

"It could as severe as learning how to pick up a spoon again, and to learn how to talk."

"I don't understand." Martha was clearly in shock. "He was shot in the chest, and not in the head..."

"Ma'am..." The doctor looked truly apologetic. "Chest wounds can effect the brain, also."

"Right...of course..." Marthara's voice cleared off.

"Grams, you should sit." Alexis helped her grandmother, who was shaking, down to a chair. Her own face was pale with greif. Kate just stood there, processing the entire information.

Castle was alive, but he might not be Castle anymore.

Than one horrible thought occured to her.

What if he didn't remember her?

"Will he have amnesia?" She asked softly. Laine, this time, had crossed the room and placed her hand on Kate's shoulder.

Esposito and Ryan stood there, in shock and also processing what they had heard.

The doctor sighed.

"I truly do not know. It is entirely possible, but doubtful seeing how he didn't substain a head injury. But yes...it is possible."

"I want to see my father." Alexis spoke in a clear voice. A voice that was strying to be strong.

"Of course."

The doctor led the way and Kate held onto Martha and Alexis's hands.

As she walkd down the corridor she tried to brace herself for what was to come.

She tried to brace herself for how different Castle would be. For how different all would be, at the end of all of this.

**i hope the characters were all in character, especially Kate and Martha!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the great reviews!**

Kate stood there and watched Alexis grab her father's limp hand. Martha was pressing her hand against his head. Both were silently crying.

Esposito shook his head in disgust at the doorway, Ryan stoood next to him, his arms folded.

"Can you believe this?" He muttered. Ryan sighed and also shook his head.

"Jesus, I mean this is _Castle_ we're looking at."

"i know, it doesn't feel right, bro," Espo agreed-bitterness in her voice.

"And to make things worse, that sonofabitch was aiming for Beckett." Ryan all but growled.

"You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?" Javier asked darkly.

"Going after the bastard? Yep." Kevin nodded, his arms still folded.

"Let's not tell Beckett," Javier decided. Ryan agreed and both slipped out before anyone noticed.

"Daddy," Alexis was sobbing. "Please wake up, please. I still need you. I need you so much. Please, daddy."

"Oh Richard," sighed Martha. "Please come back to us, my sweet boy. I am not ready to say goodbye to my son."

Kate blinked back tears and quickly walked out of the room. She stood in the hallway and breathed in heavily , in and out. She was having a hard time breathing.

It was finally there, in the privacy of that corner of the hallway, that she allowed herself to grieve.

She finally sank to her knees and let out gut wrenching, body shaking, sobs.

Then she stood up and brushed her tears away. After going into the restroom to splash water on her face she headed back to Castle's room, her face stoic, calm, and collected. Everything but what she was actually feeling.

She sat there with Martha and Alexis as they waited for their Castle to return to them.

* * *

Esposito and Ryan were back at the graveyard.

"This feels weird," Ryan muttered. "Like we're trespassing."

"We're trying to find the shooter, this is perfectly legal."

"I know...but still..the last time we were here..." Kevin's voice trailed off.

Esposito nodded.

"I understand."

Ryan distracted himself by trailing his eyes to the area where the sniper was.

"So the sniper was hiding behind those trees over there." He pointed to that direction. He frowned, an idea coming ot him. An idea he didn't like.

"Do you think the sniper was an officer?"

Esposito glanced at him.

"I don't like that idea, man. "

"I don't like that, either, but i mean...with the type of bullet that was in his chest...the type of rifle that was used...all the officers here, it makes sense-doesn't it?

Espo slowly nodded.

"That's a better lead than none."

Neither noticed a person watching in a car that had tinted windows in front of the graveyard.

* * *

Kate had ordered Martha and Alexis to go home. She promised to guard Castle, and to call if anything happened.

She stared at him,finally alone with Rick, but being unable to talk to him.

"Oh Castle." Exhaustion poured over her. It filled her body, her heart, and her mind.

She was tired, so bone tired. A deep hidden kind of tired that even Castle wouldn't have noticed.

She was so tired of hiding her feelings, of being afraid. Of losing those that she cared about because of her.

"I'm so sorry." She whispered. Tears did not come, surprisingly. "But please, wake up. I need you, Rick...I...I love you."

There, she said it. It was barely audible, but she said it. It terrified her, too.

She wasn't sure that she had fully realized her feelings for Castle.

Kate knew what she had to do, she had to repress it before she got hurt more. Before things ended tragically like they did for everyone else she had loved.

She fell asleep soon after, her hand holding Castle's. But that wasn't enough. She felt so alone, even with him there. But she wanted to be closer. She ignored her feelings as she crawled into his bed. She'd repress the, later.

When Martha and Alexis came back in the morning they had found her laying on his bed, her head resting in the nook of his neck. They didn't wake her, but left to eat breakfast at the cafeteria.

"I'm so scared, Grams," Alexis confessed at the table. Martha's throat closed.

"Oh sweetheart, I am too."

"Beckett...I've never seen her like that before..." Alexis's voice trailed off.

"You've never seen her vulnerable, and neither have I," Martha reminded her. Alexis sighed.

"It just scares me...seeing her like this...I mean, I barely know her...but she means so much to daddy..." She paused. "If something does happen to him, I'm not sure if I'll know how to comfort her."

"No one would know,honey," said Martha kindly. "But we must think positively. Your father doesn't gamble unless he knows he'll win. He's gambling with his life right now, but he'll win. He always does."

_He has to._

Kate woke to the sound of crying. She sat up, startled at where she was at. There was Alexis, sitting by herself.

"Alexis!" She got out of bed quickly, her heart pulsing. "Where's Martha?"

"Going to the restroom." Alexis sniffed and tried to look calm. "I'm sorry, we didn't want to wake you."

Kate flushed, but worry grew in her eyes.

"Alexis...are you all right?" She hesitated to ask.

Alexis paused, and bit her lip.

"I'm fine," she said finally. She glanced at her father, longing on her face. "I just miss him, that's all."

"Oh Alexis," sighed Beckett, casting aside all of her professional persona. "I do too."

Alexis's body started to shake from the crying.

"I thought I'd be able to handle this, be strong for Grams...but...he's...he's my dad."

"I know." Kate kept her voice kind, and soft as she sat next to Castle's daughter.

"I don't know how to live without him," Alexis admitted.

Kate paused.

"I don't know how to either."

Alexis looked at him.

"Do you love him, too?"

Beckett froze and stared at her, who's eyes were filled with sincere curiosity.

She breathed in and out slowly, trying to calm the panic that was trying to burst inside of wanted so badly to deny it, and ignore it until she went away. But a tiny voice inside her told her that wouldn't be wise. That the truth had to come out Then she slowly nodded.

"Yes, I do."

It was Alexis's turn to pause before she finally said.

"I'm glad."

As both reached for each other for a hug neither one noticed Castle's eyes opening-with a smile on his face...

**I still hope they are all in character!**


End file.
